I had originally wrote a post recommending FindAGrave, but now, like many other users, I see it for what it really is.

FindAGrave memorial pages are managed by one person – whomever adds the memorial first. Some people create duplicates if their loved one is already listed. This adds to confusion. You may try and submit “edits” for loved ones, but it’s up to whomever manages their memorial. I was going to add memorials for a few family members, but a stranger beat me to it each time before they were even officially buried. People go through newspapers and add listings and incorrect info for people they don’t know. They like to increase their number of contributions. (Why do some people have 9,000 memorials added?!)

People also add listings for people with no known place of burial. Names are spelled wrong. Parents are credited wrong. Wrong cemeteries and wrong wives are listed. It is a site riddled with errors.

They also having “naming conventions”. A person can only have one last name. Sure…okay. My great aunt was buried with the wrong last name on her tombstone, not her legal last name. My FindAGrave page reflected that. I did not want a duplicate memorial created if someone couldn’t find her listed under whichever last name I chose. (Leaving out the tombstone’s last name.) Then, some random lady tried to change my aunt’s last name. I rejected her “updates”. She then attacked me over someone whom she is not related to. This woman goes around and tries to be the FindAGrave police. No amount of reasoning helped. I emailed FindAGrave and they responded 2 months later…and changed my aunt’s name to what her name wasn’t. So I deleted her memorial entirely from the website.

I still don’t know if I’ll leave my other memorials up yet or not.

I would caution contributing to the website or for using it for any serious research. The system they have now for contributing is flawed. There is no help number to call, and they take two months to skim your message and offer a “reply”.